Noticing when we say "I have to..." and "I Should" can give us a clue that we might be about to trigger the stress response.
When I was buying some flowers for my window boxes on Saturday, the day before Mother's Day, I noticed several fathers with their children walking around undoubtedly looking to buy something for the mothers in their lives. They didn't look very happy, in fact, they looked solemn, even grumpy. It was a "have to." They had to buy some flowers.
In my coaching, I share some alternative phrases that I've learned from others: "I get to...," "I choose to...," and "I'm blessed to..." All three can change our energy for the activity along with our emotional state.
