It's a Wedding

Verse: Woke up with a headache, little pain in my side Sneezed twice in a row, now I’m Googlin’ why Typed in “minor cough,” hit search real fast Internet said, “Sit down son, this could be your last” Pre-Chorus: One tab said allergies, sounded pretty chill Next tab said rare disease, better update your will Chorus: I Googled my symptoms, now I’m scared to breathe Started with a sniffle, now it’s stage four something-D WebMD looked at me like, “Man, you had a good run” I Googled my symptoms, now I’m tellin’ mom I love her Verse: Toe started twitchin’, probably nothin’ at all Google said paralysis, I leaned on the wall Said it’s “very uncommon,” then bolded the part Where it lists the symptoms, and names my heart Pre-Chorus: Scrollin’ past the ads, hopin’ for good news Ended up convinced I need a hospital cruise Chorus: I Googled my symptoms, now I’m pacing the floor Started feelin’ fine, now I’m lockin’ the door One article said “drink water,” the next said “say goodbye” I Googled my symptoms, now I’m questioning life Verse: Went to the doctor, sat down real calm Told him my symptoms, showed him my phone in my palm He laughed real hard, said “Man, you’re okay” Said “Stop trusting strangers who get paid per click per day” Pre-Chorus: He said “You’re tired, dehydrated, stressed out too” I said “But the internet said I’m down to two” Chorus: I Googled my symptoms, doctor rolled his eyes Said “If Google was right, we’d all be dead by five” Prescribed me water, sleep, and less screen time I Googled my symptoms, still think he’s lyin’ Verse: Now every little itch got me spiralin’ deep Heartbeat feelin’ loud when I’m tryin’ to sleep Phone face down but I know it’s aware Judgin’ me silently like, “You gonna search that, yeah?” Chorus: I Googled my symptoms, now my trust is gone Can’t feel a thing without hittin’ Amazon Bought a blood pressure cuff and a thermometer too I Googled my symptoms, now I’m basically a doctor too Bridge: Why does every search end dramatic and dark Why they always start normal then tear you apart Why it say “rare” but it feel personal Why am I readin’ this at 2 AM, emotional Verse: Stubbed my toe hard, minor pain, no crack Google said “Internal bleeding,” I laid flat Started prayin’ to appliances in my house Tellin’ my fridge, “If I don’t make it, you get the couch” Chorus: I Googled my symptoms, yeah I played myself Turned a paper cut into cryin’ for help If anxiety burned calories, I’d be fit I Googled my symptoms, now I regret it Bridge: I should’ve just drank water, should’ve took a nap Instead I’m six searches deep in a mental collapse Every link worse than the one before Why does Google think I’m already a ghost Outro: So if you got a headache, or a cough real light Do yourself a favor, log off for the night Trust your body, trust a real MD Don’t Google your symptoms… Let ‘em Google you