Minimum wage paradise

Verse: Clocked in at the golden arches, hair net on my head Manager's named Karen, wish I'd stayed in bed There's a dude in the ball pit, hasn't moved since Tuesday And the ice cream machine's been broken since doomsday Pre-Chorus: My name tag says "Trainee" but I've been here three years The fry cook's got a PhD, fighting back the tears Someone's gonna pay for this, but baby it ain't me 'Cause I'm livin' that dollar-sixty over poverty Chorus: Welcome to the drive-thru of broken dreams Where nothing's ever quite the way it seems We're flipping burgers, slinging tacos, making subs all day Minimum wage paradise, USA, USA You want fries with that existential crisis, hon We're all dead inside but the shift ain't done Living that fast food life in polyester pants Minimum wage paradise, this is our last dance Verse: Over at Taco Bell, there's a guy named Doug Says he used to manage hedge funds before he pulled the plug Now he's making chalupas with a thousand-yard stare While his cousin rides a tiny horse through the parking lot out there Verse: Burger King's got Billy, he's missing half his teeth Says the crown is ironic when you're living underneath The poverty line, the state line, the line for government cheese But he makes a killer Whopper if you say the magic word, please Pre-Chorus: There's Jared from the Subway, wait, not THAT Jared, nah Just some dude named Jared who works at the Subway, ha He's cutting cold cuts, living rough, smells like pepperoni dreams In his sandwich artist apron, busting at the seams Chorus: Welcome to the drive-thru of broken dreams Where nothing's ever quite the way it seems We're flipping burgers, slinging tacos, making subs all day Minimum wage paradise, USA, USA You want fries with that existential crisis, hon We're all dead inside but the shift ain't done Living that fast food life in polyester pants Minimum wage paradise, this is our last dance Verse: Wendy's got a bouncer, he's four-foot-three Rides a miniature stallion, meanest dwarf you'll ever see Kicked out seventeen Karens just this afternoon Said no refunds on the Frosty like a badass cartoon Verse: There's a fight club in the freezer every other Friday night Corporate doesn't know it but the meat guy's getting tight We're all bonding over trauma and expired apple pies Creating fellowship through chaos and supersized lies Pre-Chorus: Got a sociology degree, cool, here's your mop The American dream's on aisle three, right past the slop We're the backbone of this nation, keeping bellies full While our bank accounts are emptier than the bathroom toilet roll Chorus: Welcome to the drive-thru of broken dreams Where nothing's ever quite the way it seems We're flipping burgers, slinging tacos, making subs all day Minimum wage paradise, USA, USA You want fries with that existential crisis, hon We're all dead inside but the shift ain't done Living that fast food life in polyester pants Minimum wage paradise, this is our last dance Bridge: Uh yeah, can I get a number three with no pickles Wait, what do you mean you can't remove pickles Karen intensifies Bridge: We're scholars and dreamers in visors and gloves Feeding America while getting no love But we'll laugh through the pain, we'll dance through the grease 'Cause solidarity's the secret sauce, that's our masterpiece Verse: So here's to the workers with the permanent fryer burns Making poverty wages while the whole world turns We're the rednecks, the weirdos, the ones left behind But we've got each other and we're losing our minds Outro: Yeah, we want fries with that We all want fries with that Minimum wage paradise Now get back to work, your break's been over for five minutes